Single Ladies – Episode 5- Cleanse or Choose Your Drug

Hi I am back again with a recap of Single Ladies. I plan to watch the new one tonight but we will see how that works out I haven’t ever seen it first run before kinda exciting. I hope you all enjoyed the last recap and don’t think I was too hard on the ladies; I just call them as I see them.

This week we start with Keisha showing April how to play poker. Keisha wonders how April hid an affair because she doesn’t know how to hide her emotions. Val comes out of her room all ready to go out on a blind date wearing a short mini dress with high heels. I don’t think I have ever seen her in a dress that wasn’t this short though I am not convinced most people could get away with it. LOL. I believe she has really long legs because everything is always covered. She begins to rant about how this guy has money and is a VP at a bank but that she is tired of going out on first dates.

Keisha and April suggest that Val take a break from dating because she is not finding her dream which is only frustrating her but not getting her the man she thinks she wants. Keisha points out that Val has always been with a man; Val considers Keisha’s words; she started dating in seventh grade so maybe they have a point. Keisha says Val is a man junkie “Men are your drug, you are addicted, you would go through withdrawals without male attention,” but Valerie comes back with you are one too but Keisha replies in her always sassy way “I am a recreational user, I do it for the sport.” I still think Keisha is just a hurt little girl playing games. I also find her acting to be uninspired. Her lines just do not flow from her soul they are stilted. I find it interesting they compared men to drugs. They all go to the kitchen where Val announces she is going on a man cleanse.

Neither Keisha nor April will join Val on her cleanse which is doomed to failure but she insists for twenty one days, because its well known that is how long it takes to break a habit, she will not go out on any dates. Val runs off to cancel her blind date just before April gets a text they can get into the Janet Jackson VIP section for free. Keisha starts using titles from Janet Jackson songs as they get ready to leave, it took me til this second watching to figure out what she was doing, it was kinda cute I am just not that acquainted with Janet. Val was annoyed by it, LOL, I assume because it all sounded sexual.

The next morning at work Val is more intense than usual. She takes the chance to tell Omar and Christina about her man cleanse. Yes his name was not Logan as I first remembered wrongly but Omar, LOL. Omar and Christina laugh it up at the announcement, though Val seems genuinely excited about her new journey. Christina invites Val to a party for the Fashion Institute students but Val declines despite Christina telling her that it’s not a college party but great fashion and hot music. Val explains how her new journey starts with taking a french cooking class, learning to golf, reading the great novels as well as floral arranging which to be honest isn’t as lame as just not a good replacement for dating so says me.

At the apartment Keisha is dressed for working out in the weirdest outfit or maybe I always expect work out gear to show some skin not be long pants and sneakers at home. The only thing on display is Keisha bosom though Amadeo who is her trainer, I assume new, likes the view. The tall dark trainer offers her chocolate before they begin he explains that dark chocolate provides pre-exercise energy boost. I believed this was all strange and a little hokey.

Lamest scene in the episode is when Keisha takes a bit of the candy then offers him a bit then takes another bite oh but between bites she says, “more succulent than expected,” LLLLLLLOOOOOOLLLL that was so corny it made me want to stop watching but what was next well hey I like the sensual parts some times. She is still chewing on her candy in her mouth when he starts touching her hair, her back then her stomach as she smiles. He instructs her, “suck your belly button in toward your back now push he says of moving her feet. Now unless he is on some kind of a machine she might have just been rocking back and forth as she breathes. When he tells her turn over I see she is on some sort of machine like a bench seat that moves. It’s only minutes later then he is kissing her instead of instructing her. She suggests they move to the sofa then the next scene they are having sex.

Okay I get it sex is like working out but I wonder if she paid him extra for the use of ……..oh you know LOL. “Are you feeling it in your core,” she asks as they continue. It seems they are done when he reaches for the chocolate box again, “Havent’ you had enough?” she asks, “I can’t get enough chocolate,” he replies. In case I didn’t specify the brunette is not a man of color so the answer is suppose to have a double meaning before they go at it again.

While Keisha is getting her “freak on” Valerie is at the golf course with April shopping. Yeah girls can shop anywhere and we do. Valerie justifies her spending with “the cuter I feel the better I will do.” April complains about Reed going over to Reno instead of working on his album with her before the cashier tells her that her card was declined. April goes off to call the bank while Val keep shopping as she begins to flirt with a customer. The guy looks older and she really lays on the flirting; I think flirting is natural for her like breathing. April comes back with news that Darrell is what happened to her money. WOW her husband has become a real butthole I wonder how he even has time to go to work with all his conniving, that has to take time.

Val gets up to the cashier only to found out that she has left her credit card in her other purse.
She is embarrassed and not sure what to do before the gentleman she was flirting with moments before comes over than offers to pay for her items. They seem to know the man and Valerie promises to repay him with clothes from her store. The man, Jerry Waters, turns out to be a friend of some random Senator. We all know that is just to show us the man has wealth and will be a fly in Val’s ointment as she continues her man cleanse.

At the party that night, yeah the one that Val didn’t want to attend, they show up all dressed up to find hip hop music, some slightly good designs according to Val and a drunk Christina. Keisha has announced on the way in that they shouldn’t stay more than fifteen minutes but Keisha finds a magazine with Malcolm advertising his clothes using other models than her. “And he wonders why I’m done with him,” she says before she continues to read through the magazine. I believe this only solidifies my stance on Keisha, she is always hiding her hurt.

Val chances the crowd to get to the food table to find its a wreck then some guy who knows her name or brand says hello. He offers her a beer but it ends up on her expensive clothing do to his clumsiness. Val is ready to go and though Omar has found him some fun Keisha and Val go off to find Christina to tell her they are leaving. Christina who seems to have a one track mind is in the bathroom “hooking up” with her professor who actually likes her in his twisted way.

After the break we seem them at the boutique, April comes in looking for Darrell who had asked to meet her. Christina shows up next with no shame about the night before. Val tries to make her feel bad about them seeing her having sex but she won’t have any of it. I agree with Christina they are consenting adults the others well Val needs to move on to be more concerned about Christina’s work not her love life. Darrell shows up driving a Beemer so he could throw his spending in April’s face. He is in overkill; spending half of her trust fund and flaunting it in her face he is of course hurting but though April was wrong to cheat on him he is wrong for taking it this far, my opinion, though it’s just money right? Up until this point April had hope they might get back together but she has to face facts now that the Darrell she married is gone, the ladies agree its time for April to get her own lawyer.

That night as they are closing the store Omar tells Val if her new journey is making her sad, lonely and horny maybe she needs a new plan. Val says the point of her new plan is to stop feeling incomplete without a man. Omar leaves just before Jerry walks in the door; Omar drools over Jerry before he leaves. Val offers to let Jerry look around to get new clothing; he declines. He offers to take her dinner then to let her pay since she owes him. He kept changing the wording around until they actually were going to eat at the same table aka a date. Oh that was so slick, NOT!!

After the break, Val returns from her time out with Jerry to find her apartment has been robbed. The money never made it to the bank because of her little detour so it’s all gone. Val’s call to Keisha leads to her finding all of the money Keisha has stashed in the apartment. She put it all in a work out bag according to Keisha’s instruction, Lucy you got some splainin’ to do LOL

April explains after the cops leave that Keisha had convinced her to siphon off money from her trust fund to keep it from Darrell. Keisha’s money was from playing poker so that she could have some money without it being taxed. Val is worried because she thinks she is accessory to two crimes but Keisha lets her know it has nothing to do with her. I am with Keisha on this one. Hell to the NO, everything isn’t about you Val. Val thinks that April is being insensitive to her position in Darrell’s life, huh I think she is being selfish the two of them have problems enough with her making it personal. I know April cheated then asked her to lie about it but still its not about HER!!

OH and Keisha tries to act surprised when she realizes her Sexy Italian Play boy toy aka work out instructor was the one to break in to the apartment. She figures this out when she finds her chocolate box in the living room ? Uh yeah that’s a clue I guess Italian guy was robbing the place and stop for a snack? Okay I would have thought he would send someone not come himself but he had to have more chocolate? They sell chocolate at stores he didn’t have to steal some or anything. Val immediately gets on Keisha’s case for bringing the stranger in their apartment. I think Val’s lack of a man has made her cranky. April makes a point when she mentions the plain fact that the store receipts should not have been in the apartment. HELLO, whose fault is this really? Val weakly explains that she went to to eat and she was the one that brought the receipts upstairs instead of taking them to the bank. Keisha swears she will still get the thief back for his betrayal.

A week later we find out Keisha was unable to track down the thief. Val explains she contacted her insurance company so she will get back her money. Here we get the lesson of the week to deal rightly with others and nice things will happen. Val who does nothing wrong was able to get her money back whereas Keisha who only wants to have money put away is to begin considering if maybe she shouldn’t have stolen Malcolm’s watch which I knew nothing about; not sure how I missed that. Yeah the moral of the week, what goes around comes around, whatever.

Aaron, Christina’s professor shows up to take her to lunch or have sex whichever comes up. Val tries to intercept Christina who seems to know what she wants and ignores her. I wonder if some big drama is coming up with Christina because of her wanton ways and the ways of this show to give us moral messages while we watch them looking like fashion models and living like royalty.

April appears again looking for Darrell who wanted to meet her at the boutique yet again. Val insists that Darrell and April need to find a neutral location to meet; she is very preachy this week not sure I noticed that before. I think its the man cleanse LOL home girl needs to take care of her business.

Jerry shows up to try to convince Val to go out with him but though she likes him she wants to finish her cleanse first but they can hang out with no physical contact. I wonder if Val thinks all men are like the guy she let get away, what was his name? Any way they agree she is going to pay him back with a bag of designer clothes Yahoo but I guess at the prices she probably charges he will get a shirt, two pair socks and a pair of shorts LOL for twenty three hundred dollars. Keisha runs over after Jerry leaves to let Val know that Jerry who Val had never met till recently is the owner of the team that Val’s ex-boyfriend plays for. Val doesn’t seem phased by this announcement.

April and Darrell go upstairs for what surely April thought would be congenial conversation but alas Darrell is still being a jerk. April insists she wants the lawyers to deal with their divorce and issues from now on.

Outside Val confronts Darrell; he calls Val a bitch then she says she hid the affair to protect herself because she didn’t want to be in the middle. She calls him an a colossal a**and then tells him he can go to hell because of his behavior.

That night at the apartment they are set up for a movie night; Val’s choices include Cujo or Fatal Attraction then finally Love Jones ?!. April announces she found a place not far from the boutique. Keisha decides they will pick from pay per view. While Val is in the other room, Queen Latifah’s character, Sharon who was a friend of Val’s in high school, says she slept with Val television though she doesn’t know the camera is still rolling.

Val walks back in the room to hear it; she looks shocked that it had been said on television as well the other do too.

I thought Queen Latifah’s character was a counselor/psychiatrist but now she is on the news as an anchor or something? Now I am confused.

As far as the episode being about Val not feeling comfortable without a man in her life that was not well illustrated as far as I can see but we did see she is an habitual flirt. April coming to terms with Darrell’s reaction to her cheating was sad but well thought out where the Keisha part was all over the place for me. I know Keisha likes to sleep around but we also know she likes and misses Malcolm which just shows her whole hurt little girl persona. She wants the man who knows how to use her in a way that she doesn’t realize it to after the fact, that is whack!!

My rating for this episode is a 5 out of 10. I still like the idea of the show but a lot of the acting is just not good. I think because it’s on VH1 which is known for music videos or reality television so its fun but not the type of show you will see on regular television channels.

Thanks for reading; please feel free to comment. I am open for discussion.
Photo Credit: Capped from VH1

One Response to “Single Ladies – Episode 5- Cleanse or Choose Your Drug”

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